DownSyn Forum

Kenzie

Kenzie is 17 weeks old and I am trying to find a way to get her to sleep without me having to nurse her. My husband tried feeding her and then putting her to sleep, but she won't sleep, so I would have to nurse her so she gets even more sleepy and then fall asleep with me carrying her before I put her down. How do I teach her to fall asleep on her own? is that even possible? I read many articles that says "put then down when they are drowsy, but not asleep and let them soothe themselves to sleep"? I can't even imagine her doing this because when I put her down she's wide awake again! Is there a method someone used that worked and doesn't require them to cry that much? I haven't tried any methods yet and don't really want to try the cry it out method, but I need her to fall asleep without having only me put her to sleep so I will try anything!! It takes me at least an hour to be able to get her to sleep and put her down...if I put her down too soon, she'll wake up. I don't want to have to nurse her to sleep forever because I know that will be bad when her teeth eventually start to come in and I don't want her to rely on it incase I want to go out for the evening in the furture. Help!

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Cindy mom to Kenzie DS(Oct. 8/11)
Undetected and as rare as rare can be...my little ninja.

AuntieM · Posted: February 10 2012, 10:13 AM Post subject:

I am convinced that always holding babies until they fall deeply asleep causes huge problems later on. She will figure out how to self-soothe if you give her the opportunity.
I would start right away putting her down when she is full, dry, and drowsy. She may need to cry a bit, but at some point in her life she has to accomplish the essential life skill of going to sleep (happily) on her own. No reason to delay because this is a skill best learned early. If you can't let her cry it out (which is really, in the end, the least traumatic for her) go in periodically to comfort her but don't pick her up- ever! If you stick with it you will not regret it.

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Mary, retired Pediatric Clinical Nurse Specialist
Great-aunt to Tarryn (DS, 5 years old)

Dylans_Mom · Posted: February 10 2012, 10:52 AM Post subject:

you need find something that works for both of you. Dylan was always a belly sleeper because it was safer for him because of his reflux. We use to pat his back until he fell a sleep and then slowly worked our way out of that, were we just patted it part of the time, and then down to just a few pats. It worked and now at age 6 we put him to bed say good night and leave the room, he is asleep on his own in less then 5 minutes, he is a GREAT sleeper for us. Wink

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Sandy (Dylans_Mom)
Mom to Hailey 3/2002, Dylan (ds) 12/2005

TheBradyBunch · Posted: February 10 2012, 10:58 AM Post subject:

Um yeah...at 17 weeks old....it's NORMAL for her to fall asleep nursing.

Also, I can tell you, it doesn't cause huge problems later on if you allow her to fall asleep while nursing, it's what babies are meant to do. This isn't a learned behaviour. This is instinct.

Allowing a 17 week old to cry it out, is NOT a good idea. You are just teaching your baby that you won't come when she needs you. There is a reason that as mothers we feel anxiety and the need to soothe our babies when we hear them cry, there is a reason we can't relax while our baby is screaming in the next room. Allowing them to cry also releases seratonin and can flood their little brains CAUSING problems emotionally for them later on in life.

If you want to try to teach her to fall asleep on the bottle, you can do that, without making her cry or leaving her alone to cry it out. It will take some time and patience, and probably you to stop nursing her all together.

I can also say this, as a mother of 6, soon to be 7. My kids (except Noah) didn't sleep through the night until after 12 months old, usually closer to 18 -24. By then they were given bottles and yes that is how they fall asleep. Bottles turn into sippy cups with water, and no my kids don't have bad teeth, they are brushed regularly and the sippy cups are gone by 2.5.

The only one of my kids that has had sleeping issues is Noah, who has Down Syndrome & Autism. He is the only one who never nursed. He is the only one who never fell asleep to a bottle.

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Mom to: Nicholas (May/02), Nathan (April/04), Charlene (June/06), Noah (DS, ASD) (May/07), Jesse Lynn (July/08 ), Tessa (Apr/10), Kaitlyn (Jun/12)

"Sometimes the things we can't change end up changing us"

mary c · Posted: February 10 2012, 12:29 PM Post subject:

I would try to make it comfy in bed. You could put a hot water bottle I. The crib to warm up the space before you put her down(removing it just before you put her in the crib). Also play soft classical music, rub her arm or something and let her know that bed is a good place.

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Mary
Mom to Libby 6/92, Alex 9/93, Anna (DS)12/12/03

Please support the Down Syndrome Research and Treatment Foundation http://i139.photobucket.com/albums/q284/maryc_010/a13-1.jpg[/img]

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TheosMom · Posted: February 11 2012, 1:30 AM Post subject:

Theo falls asleep on the boob at night still at 6 months and I don't think it's bad, as someone said it's instinct for them to do so and instinct for us to go to them when crying! Even though he is more easily awoken at this age, last night he woke after a night feed while I lay him in the crib so I rubbed his belly for a few minutes and he went out!! ..... in other words she might surprise you, she is still young, give it time. There are a ton of websites out there about sleep and everything baby, I'm a big fan of Kellymom and Dr Sears myself, both don't go for 'cry it out' but might have some other ideas for you. Good Luck!! After reading about all of these little ones on here, when I do feel tired from BFing, I think I am blessed to be able to do so with so many potential problems in our kids.

Kenzie · Posted: February 11 2012, 9:18 AM Post subject:

Thank you so much for all the suggestions and personal experiences!!! I really do appreciate it! I think I will allow her to keep nursing to sleep for now, since it works and no tears. Hopefully she'll figure things out herself later and for now I'll just keep working out my arms from carrying her Very Happy

_________________
Cindy mom to Kenzie DS(Oct. 8/11)
Undetected and as rare as rare can be...my little ninja.

Nicola · Posted: February 12 2012, 5:58 PM Post subject:

I always developed a routine from newborn of feeding as soon as baby wakes, have happy play time, and then AS SOON as baby gets grizzly or even the movements jerky then I would swaddle the baby and put them to bed, patting as little as possible to get them to go to sleep. This routine began from birth. I never ever let a baby go to sleep feeding. The baby quickly understood that swaddling meant sleep, and most of my babies slept through the night from very early. Other than one with severe reflux, the latest was 4 months to sleep through the night.

_________________
https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc1/457305_4140051469588_391538551_o.jpg
Mum to Brendan 18, Chiara 17, Kiernan 15, Aidan 13, Lachlan 12, Gianna 10 (DS) and Sienna 8.
"This then is what Yahweh asks of you: to act justly, to love tenderly and to walk humbly with your God."

Nicola · Posted: February 12 2012, 5:59 PM Post subject:

I always developed a routine from newborn of feeding as soon as baby wakes, have happy play time, and then AS SOON as baby gets grizzly or even the movements jerky then I would swaddle the baby and put them to bed, patting as little as possible to get them to go to sleep. This routine began from birth. I never ever let a baby go to sleep feeding. The baby quickly understood that swaddling meant sleep, and most of my babies slept through the night from very early. Other than one with severe reflux, the latest was 4 months to sleep through the night.

_________________
https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc1/457305_4140051469588_391538551_o.jpg
Mum to Brendan 18, Chiara 17, Kiernan 15, Aidan 13, Lachlan 12, Gianna 10 (DS) and Sienna 8.
"This then is what Yahweh asks of you: to act justly, to love tenderly and to walk humbly with your God."

kctahoe · Posted: February 13 2012, 3:57 PM Post subject:

You know, I think you just have to figure out what works for you. As far a I have been told, letting a baby nurse to sleep is not a problem for teeth, or a problem for the baby... it does seem to be a problem for mommy though! But in truth many cultures around the world would think of having baby sleep no other way than nursing to sleep and free access to the breast all night long. We have tried different things over the years with three boys (the two older ones having nursed for 3 years each, the third is only 15 months but still nursing of course), and we have settled on just letting them nurse when they need to, and we just adjust out lives to that inconvenience. Actually, we like it... it is what works for us. So don't feel pressure, find what works for you as a family, and then work on it patiently. I liked Nicola's method of always feeding a baby as soon as they wake up, not waiting to do it until they are tired. We did try that with our third, but eventually drifted into what works for us, and we are good with that. Hope you can figure out what works for you, and make it work with your life. It's great that he is nursing.

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Kim. Wife to Ray, Mommy to Charlie (DS), Calvin, and Miles.

lissad63 · Posted: February 13 2012, 8:42 PM Post subject:

Looks like many have the same advice but wanted to echo that 17 weeks seems much too early to try and get her to sleep on her own. Enjoy the time with her! Smile

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http://babypelly.livejournal.com

Kenzie · Posted: February 14 2012, 4:01 PM Post subject:

Thanks again for the info Smile

, I know she's still young, but I get mixed messages from people and readings about getting them to sleep themselves, that I was unsure if I was doing things right or not, but after reading the posts, I feel much better that's it's ok and pretty normal Smile

thanks again ladies!

_________________
Cindy mom to Kenzie DS(Oct. 8/11)
Undetected and as rare as rare can be...my little ninja.