This was in our local paper last night to the " Letter to the Editor." I know that the "R" word will never vanish, but I hope they can teach people to contain the word. Just wanted to share with you.

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The "R" word, it hurts

To the Editor:

whether it is Ramh Emanuel using the "R" word in a negative connotation, Glen Beck selling T-shirts "Satan's Mentally Challenged Younger Brother" or the film Tropic Thunder, people are standing up and saying "No more!"

It's not just kids on the playground that use this term, it is also adults. Think about how many times you've heard someone say, "He's such a 'R' " or " I can't believe I just did that, I'm such a 'R'." It is said so often that in general people think nothing of it. And, it's not bad people saying the word; it is just people not thinking about the impact of their words.

Words do hurt. People we serve at the Madison Cortland ARC have made it very clear that they don't like the "R" word. One woman said that when she was growing up, her brother and his friends would pick on her and call her the "R" word, or as she would say it, "that word." It would bring her to tears every time.

She never asked to be born with a disability. It wasn't her choice, but that is what life gave to her and she has achieved so much with help and support. But the "R" word stings her when she hears it.

Sen. Barbara Mikulski from Maryland has introduced Senate Bill 2781 named Rosa's Law that will "change references in federal law to mental retardation to references to an intellectual disability, and change references to a mentally retarded individual to references to an individual with an intellectual disability."

Rosa's Law is named after an elementary student with Down Syndrome. Her family convinced the school district that the terminology of " mentally 'R' "was derogatory. They also gave testimony before the Senate about the negative connotation of that terminology. Suggested and more accepted terms would be " intellectually disabled, " "mentally challenged" or "developmental disability."

This bill passed, will be a start to removing the "R" word, but it won't stop the negative comments made on the playground or on television or in homes across the nation. That will start with each one of us individually. If you must use the "R" word, then use it as a verb not a noun.

Let's pay a little more attention to what we are saying. And let's be sensitive to people who are mentally challenged who are working so hard to achieve and to be accepted in society.

Ray L
Executive Director
Madison Cortland ARC

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~Christine~
Mom of 6
Brandon ADD/ADHD 17, Chelsea 14, Connor 12, Logan 6, Cody 4 & Austin 1 ( DS & Hirschsprungs pull through 12/8/08 )
http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/austinpaquin

Thanks for sharing that letter. I feel so bad for that woman whose own brother and his friends picked on her and how it still hurts her today. I wonder if he realizes the impact of what he did?

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Maureen - Mom to Daniel(21), Brandon(19), Jordan(13)PDD, Thomas(11), Carrie(7), Samuel(4) and Mark (2 - ds, av canal -repaired 6/10/08, pulmonary hypertension)
https://www.carepages.com/carepages/MarkEdwardC32708

The saying on the Glen Beck t-shirt proves that it doesn't really matter what term we use, someone will use it as a put down. It all comes down to a matter of respect and for some reason a certain segment of society feels our kids don't deserve respect. How do you legislate respect?

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"There's a release in knowing the truth no matter how anguishing it is. You come finally to the irreducible thing, and there's nothing left to do but pick it up and hold it. Then, at least, you can enter the severe mercy of acceptance." Sue Monk Kidd

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful people can make a difference, in fact it is the only thing that ever has." Margaret Meade

Ann, married to Tim, mom to Sally, Mark, Jane, John (12/02, DS), Paul and Alice

www.caringbridge.org/visit/johnbremer

Thanks for sharing just a couple weeks ago 2 kids told my son his little brother was "r". I was mad anyway after the pricipal was told by a aid at the school. The children told my oldest son that they were sorry and one wrote a letter apologizing.

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Lori
Wife to Wes (briarsdad)
Mom to Will(11)9-14-98 Briar(8)DS 6-22-01

I am so ashamed of these celebrities!! Today I have called and written to Stephen Colbert. I have also written to Glenn Beck. Rush is next and Sarah Palin is after that.

For heaven's sake, it's just one word, one segment of the population. Are we really running out of words to use that we cannot let go and stop using this word?? How hard is it to realize that if one simple word in our speech is hurting others, then stop using it??!!

I'm so sick of all of this!!


Ibby

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Ibby
Wife to Tim- 22 years. Mother to Maggie,21; Bridget,19; Kevin,17; Sean,15; Daniel,12; Catherine,11; Robert,8; Emily,7; Maria,5; Hope, 4, AJ (Ds) June 14, 2006

http://www.onetruemedia.com/shared?p=26012b09b29bd00fe629cb&skin_id=0&utm_source=otm&utm_medium=text_url

People tell me that I am more sensitive to this since Clara was born, but I honestly think that the r word is more common than it was when I was younger. We used it, but it wasn't all over tv, movies, and the media like it is now. I really think the younger generation has taken to that word (that's coming from someone in her 40's). I think my SIL would be lost if she didn't have the r word as her fallback insult.

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Anara
Wife to Craig (wed 3.8.03)
Mom to Clara (DS, Autism, born 8.8.05), Alan Russell (born 3.9.07)

Visit us on Facebook - I finally caved in!
Or my blog: able2able... your special needs resource directory http://www.able2able.com

As you all probally know I work at a special needs daycare and at least 1 time a week I hear someone use that word. I am like come on people!!! I love facebook, well someone thought they would be funny and make a joke about a r and tin foil. When I posted that that word offended me HOLY COW it was on. The person said that it ticked (NOT THE WORD THEY USED) her off when people with children with special needs presumed that everytime that someone used that word it was in reference to a child with special needs. Well the person ended up looking really not very smart. I had soooo many people thanking me for standing up and making them aware. ANYWAY the problem will never go away but we can change people one at a time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Lori
Wife to Wes (briarsdad)
Mom to Will(11)9-14-98 Briar(8)DS 6-22-01